26/07/2010

Well, increasingly obvious that I can't control myself. Especially not when alcohol is involved. For some reason I get desperate to fight and cause trouble. A drunk me really is a recipe for trouble. The flipside of becoming who I am is that I am quite an angry person. An uninhibited version of me will fight.

I feel alive. But sometimes a full on version of me is a bit scary. Still adamant that drugs are very bad for you. But why am I angry? I think it's just in my genes. Easily provoked, looking for trouble, wanting to prove my warrior credentials. I don't have a "good" reason for being angry. I am seriously thinking of becoming a monk, and stop interaction with the modern world. But then, celibacy and vegetables isn't really what I'm after. Other times I want to be Rambo, and wage war on society.